May 2025

This month, I turned 29 years old, which I have mixed feelings about. I feel like everyone is always like, "Oh don't worry if you don't have it figured out, that's what your 20's are for" but my 30's are right on the horizon and I still have no idea what the fuck I'm doing—watching movies I guess. I think the structure of last month threw me off a bit, so I only ended up seeing 29 total movies, oddly enough.
In other news, we entered into the final trimester of our first pregnancy and are getting ready to welcome our baby boy into the world! We're registered at MyRegistry.com if you'd like to take a look.

The Whale [2022]

Brendan Fraser single handedly adds twenty percent to my rating, giving an earnest performance from his soul that I really loved and do not regret seeing. I've liked him for along time, and seeing him in a lead role again was wonderful; Hong Chau and him have great chemistry also. Second to that, I liked Simonsen's music.

I do feel like it was constantly insulting the audience. The movie centers around empathy and intelligence, but it doesn't trust us to reach any of those conclusions for ourselves. Much of the film is spelled out for you, either by unnecessary exposition or the blunt cudgel that is "the essay". Most of the secondary characters are annoying as hell and seem content to prolong this man's suffering at all costs, including the narrative (a critique of the writing and dialogue, not the actors).

I hoped for more, but Fraser has still fucking got it man!

    5/10

    Beaux Score: 5/10 "I'm interested to read the play, but the movie had nothing for me but Brendan."

Punishment Park [1971]

"At another time, the honorable thing or the right thing to do might be to be a policeman or to be President. Right now, I think the honorable thing to do is to be a criminal."

Nothing is sacred to them. The propaganda machine manufactures the conditions to rationalize it's existence. Any act can be labeled a violent one, therefore any means is necessary to quell it & any consequence is justified. Peace through subjugation.

Sometimes I feel like my anger is too deeply rooted in me. It's fire is in my idle thoughts, in the blood in my veins, the marrow of my bones—logos, thymus, & eros. Watkins was angry, and he put so much rage into this movie. My ancestors felt it as well, considering their history; they stole, formed rebellions, and shot soldiers. 

So what am I to do?

    10/10

Songs My Brothers Taught Me [2015]

A thousand little griefs.

I saw Nomadland earlier this year, and this is essentially the same narrative & cinematic work director Zhao & and cinematographer Richards did for that film, except the message works this time & it has characters I actually cared about.

    6/10

Blade [1998]

Absolutely absurd, revels in its campiness, Disney Marvel will never compete.

    6/10

    Beaux Score: "There will only ever be one Blade"

Blade II [2002]

Guillermo Del Torro, you are such a weird dude & I love you. He elevates the material beyond the campiness without it losing its soul.

    8/10

    Beaux Score: "I guess I was wrong"

Smoke Signals [1998]

“Yeah, you’re leaving the rez and goin’ to a whole different country, cousin.”

     "But… but, it’s the United States.”

"Damn right it is! That’s a foreign as it gets. Hope you two have your vaccinations!”

It’s a heartfelt road trip comedy about forgiving your dad. Hit me right in that good way, that sacred indigenous way, that ‘feel-the-message-from-the-wind-and-birds-and-sun’ way.

    8/10

    Beaux Score: 7/10 "Forgive your dad or someone else will"

The Ides of March [2015]

I wish politics were even half this “noble” these days. 

Fucking stacked cast, really really great performances, but I feel like it could’ve used a little more chaos—more spinning plates, more concessions, the weight of it all.
Fun story that might inform my review: My across the street neighbor was blaring white pride music for the whole neighborhood while I was trying to watch this. Weird day.

    6/10

    Beaux Score: "Damn, can't even trust the pretend politicians"

A Warning to the Curious [1972]

I believe there is magic in this world. I believe in spirits—restless, relentless forces more eternal than us—and we can either learn to live with them, or they will make themselves known.

    8/10

The Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith [1978]

A tale that blurs the lines of vengeance & justice so perfectly, it might as well be a western. It doesn't take much to show why an Aboriginal might end up murdering a white australian, but I like how this film spends it's first half showing us exactly how and why Jimmie developed his rage.

I want one of Uncle Tabidgi's sacred stones🥺

    8/10

Sleepless in Seattle [1993]

I really liked the scene with the spirit of his wife. I loved the way he spoke about her on the radio, I loved how grieved and lost he was by her passing. And then we get the best stalker girl representation in a romcom, though I did like the Meg Ryan's side much more than the Tom Hanks side. The kid was only a little annoying, but they do that thing where the kid's annoying behavior is justified and the little shit looks so god damn proud of himself that it makes you feel like you want to push their head underwater for a few seconds, ya know?

It was still a cute ending.

    7/10

Evil Does Not Exist [2023]

No one is responsible. That's just the way things are, how they've always been. This will benefit your community. They're timid, they'll go somewhere else. We are listening to your concerns.

I loved how much time is spent with the land, both as a labor and as a landscape. It's a beautiful film with an even better score. One of those movies I'm just gonna be thinking about casually for months.

    9/10

The Worst Person in the World [2021]

I figured the title was misleading because I’m the worst person in the world, and I don’t remember flying to Norway to star in it.

But then the film ended up being about a person struggling with fear & uncertainty as time marches her into her 30’s, so it turns out yes it was about me after all—rude.

    8.5/10

Step Brothers [2008]

It’s another family movie that feels inseparable from my childhood, so I can’t judge it fairly. It’s actually more ridiculous than I remember.

Nothing quite beats watching it with my little brother though, especially while he recites all the lines—he'd single handedly and another two points to my rating.

    6/10, I want you out of my fucking house.

    Beaux Score: 6/10, "I understand the average straight white guy a lot more now"

Unbreakable [2000]

If this is a good Shyamalan movie, then my ADHD did not vibe with this one guys I'm sorry.

It was so slow! I was waiting for the reveal to be a plot point rather than the whole twist, roll credits! Yeah the camera work was good and it explores some interesting themes for it's time but..? If I'm wrong about this please tell me and I will resolve to see it again.

    5/10

Inconvenient Indian [2020]

"The truth about stories is, that’s all we are. Once a story is told it cannot be called back. Once told, it's loose in the world. So you have to be careful with the stories you tell, and you have to watch out for the stories you are told."

We are still here.

We are not the silent mannequins of stolen artifacts you hang in your museums, or the Italians you see dying onscreen in a western; you just don't like to look at us because we have not changed. Indigenous are still fighting for their land, and will always be the loud inconvenient Indian to your inconvenient truth in your inconvenient fucking way! And if that gives you some Native Guilt™, just remember: it's not your fault things are this way for any of us, but we're all in this together at this point (there's no going back) so you should come on over to our side of the fence and fight with us this time.

Loved the content of the documentary, though I did find it to be somewhat oddly fragmented and paced. It was already on my sights, but I am now even more inclined to check out Thomas King's novel of the same name.

One final note: I understand that the director, Michelle Latimer, has had some controversy about her genealogy. From what I can gather, she seems to have made a genuine error as a result of believing her family's oral history. She apologized for any harm she did, and hasn't been around much since then (certainly not as an Indigenous person). Idk, I haven't looked too much into it to say for certain, but I'm inclined to believe her.
The controversy certainly shouldn't dissuade you from enjoying the film!

    7/10

Castle in the Sky [1986]

Charming and impressive animation, classic Ghibli. Its premise is very simple and I got wrapped up immediately, but it was just a little too long.

Oh and also, I have never wanted a Spanish dub more: Ándale pues a la ciudad de La-Puta!

    7/10

    Beaux Score: 8/10, "Cute and wholesome, slightly less if you speak any Spanish"

Electrick Children [2012]

I loved how sweet this story is to characters and their journey. This easily could be a very different tale, but it's about a 15 year old girl and it preserves its own innocence throughout. So very gentle, even though it triggered my friend Kaylee (who also ultimately thought it was very sweet & cozy).

Also, who hasn't had a romantic just-in-case marriage proposal when you were only a kid but meant it with every fiber of your soul—even forwards through time?

    8.5/10, for all of my exmorm friends

The Pirates! In an Adventure With Scientists! [2012]

Funny pirate adventure, surprising cast, and my favorite depiction of Queen Victoria maybe ever. Fun fact, you probably remember it as The Pirates! Band of Misfits, because apparently the cast and crew didn't believe americans would have the patience for the longer title. 

    7/10

    Beaux Score: "That's a 9/10 childhood favorite from me"

A Real Pain [2024]

//the credits begin to roll//

"You know, that feeling!" I say with a nervous laugh, chocking back tears before saying an awkward goodnight, hurrying to bed only to not sleep but completely disassociate instead.

I didn't expect this to express itself as much as it did: the frustrations of mental illnesses, the grief of losing a close family member, rationalizing ancestorial struggle and your own. Really snuck up on me.

Gonna link Mike Flanagan here for saying everything I felt so much better than I can, but in fairness he is a writer and I hear that's what they do for a living.

    9.5/10, I need to stop hard relating to every majorly depressed person on screen

    Beaux Score: 9/10, "Tag yourself, I'm the emotionally unstable cousin"

¡Qué Viva México! [1979]

I'm really not sure how to feel about a film that seems at war with itself, and reading up a little bit regarding it's tumultuous production makes it feel like that conflict a part of the movie's soul.

It was filmed in 1931 could not be finished until 1979. But it never actually finished filming, because of investors losing faith in the project. And it is not the original director who finally concluded it's production (because he died), but his writer who took up the mantle of co-director. It's also a Soviet documentary on Mexico, but it also has characters & a plot that develop halfway through. It's a silent film, with narration to help explain the original director's vision.

My interest in the movie fluctuated throughout, but by the end I finally saw the idea and I mourned the movie that never was, at least a little bit. Feels impossible to really rate so I'll leave it at that.

Harakiri [1962]

Look, I'm not very well versed in samurai films but this one may be among the best of them. Like with westerns, honor is a common theme amongst these types of films, as is the fading of the warriors way of life.

Harakiri, also called seppuku, is the ritualistic suicide samurai will perform in defeat to preserve their honor in death. What we see on screen is perhaps one of the most uncomfortable moments I've seen in a minute, but I was amazed at how carefully the act was handled. "Careful" is a word I'd use to describe most of the film; careful in it's dialogue, it's camera work, the work of it's character, the love they have for each other. Honor means everything, and it means nothing.

Timeless, though provoking, absolutely fascinating.

    10/10, I'm never going to get over the ckeeky little way Hanshiro says "Oh."

Cronos [1992]

“Tu pierdes mas que yo. Lo mío es nada más dolor.”

Felt inspired to check out Guillermo del Torro’s first feature length film. It felt like the man was brimming with ideas, but it does feel like he was still finding his footing—pacing being the more glaring issue.

Probably deserves a slightly lower score, but I'm giving it an extra point for surprising me with the monster.

    7/10

Bad Day at Black Rock [1955]

An intriguing western / noir, commentary on the US’s treatment of the Japanese Americans during WW2, and a real polite but unsettling town. Small town Arizona is just like that though; it does things to white people, they were never meant to get that much sun.

    9/10

    Beaux Score: 9/10 "Legitimately more tense than a lot of horror movies I've watched"

Janet Planet [2023]

A movie for girls who love their mom but hate the people she dates.

With many a captivating shots I can easily say I liked watching this movie, but I really liked listening to it—the only music was in universe, and the rest of the time it created such an immersive atmosphere. Zoe Ziegler is an incredible little actress and I wish her nothing but the best. Otherwise it was a little slow, and just not really for me personally.

    7.5/10

The Meg [2018]

Seeing both Crank & Crank 2 as my main introduction into the Stathem-verse really traumatized me, and I'm glad this wasn't that. The movie is full of CGI action, questionable science, brain-dead decision making, and beautiful ocean shots.

What was up with that tone shift at the very end? Sorta felt like there was gonna be an end credit scene or something and it just turned into a Thai cover of a pop song?

    5.5/10

    Beaux Score: 5/10, "I recommend seeing this movie if you say 'the Dong' every time you see a shark.

The Mask of Zorro [1998]

Finally, a movie that portrays the horrors of colonialism and can be enjoyed by the whole family! 

I cannot tell you how cool it was to grow up with this movie as a little Latino boy. You can nitpick at it for days, but it’s way more fun if you just enjoy it. 

    8.5/10, ¡Viva el Zorro!

    Beaux Score: "YES"

After Life [1998]

So much of the enjoyment of the film comes from the questions it asks its viewer, and the answers you come up with. The central question at the center of the movie is: If you could only take one memory of your life with you into eternity, which would it be? Memory is fickle, fallible, a frustrating facsimile of the reality—yet it is what defines us. One thing that surprised me was it is surprisingly free of cheap emotional tricks for a film about death and mediation on a life lived. It was just another (albeit incredibly reflective) step on their journey, waiting in another line, doing their best like they always have.

I took some time to meditate on this question—three days, like its characters—and I came up with the following:

Wyoming, November 2020.

My dad and I had been drawn for a mule deer hunt in the south western mountains (my wife accompanied us for the first time). I’m pretty sure it is the first time a member of my family had set foot in those lands let alone hunted there, and the first few days reflected that well enough. But eventually we spotted him, standing proud beneath a canopy of fall aspen leaves. With the wind in our favor, we crouched low and closed the distance, and I killed him.

I remember the triumph then; a moment of personal success at a time of my life where I did not feel successful, in a hunt that was beginning to feel more and more hopeless. My grandfather once told my dad that one day, he hoped to reincarnate as a deer after he died, and we’d know him because he’d just stand there—I waked to within 90 yards of that deer before I took my shot.

But the memory I’d want to take with me is the walk back. We were all exhausted from the field dressing, hauling the parts of him up a steep hill only to go down and back up another to get back to camp. I had shot him kinda late, it was dark and so very cold, but the chill felt wonderful with how hard we were working. We had collapsed for a rest, and we were looking at the stars— I have never seen stars like that, before or since.

Then again, I’d probably just end up watching tapes of my life, gleefully critiquing the main characters choices, and waiting around to watch all of your reels.

    9/10